The Currency of Validation

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I missed last week — the same way I’ve been missing sleep lately.

Life’s kind of crashed me out, and this household definitely doesn’t help. I took a couple weeks off to get my head back on straight, to breathe, to stop spiraling in circles about things I can’t control. I don’t know if I’m “ready” yet, but honestly, life isn’t going to wait for me to catch up. So here I am, tired but trying — and that’s got to count for something.

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Somewhere in that quiet, I found myself thinking about social media — because of course my brain loops back to that even when it’s supposed to be resting. It’s strange how the things that used to bring me joy now come with this weird undercurrent of pressure. Likes, follows, engagement — all of it has become a kind of currency, but one that only holds value in the hands of whoever’s collecting it.

When someone likes your post, you feel it. You get that little dopamine hit, that “someone saw me” moment. But when you like someone else’s post, it doesn’t mean the same thing. It’s not that it’s empty — it’s just… different. Like we’re all walking around with our own currencies, trading validation that doesn’t actually convert.

“We’re all trading validation in different currencies that don’t really convert.”

And god, it’s exhausting.

I miss when posting online felt like leaving a note for the universe. When I’d share something because it was funny or real or just because I wanted to, not because I thought it might perform well. Now I overthink everything: the timing, the hashtags, the tone, the potential engagement. I’ve become my own marketing department for thoughts that used to just exist.

The wildest part? I know I’m not alone in it.Every creator I know — big or small — has had that moment of sitting there, staring at their analytics, trying to measure self-worth in numbers that refresh every few seconds. And yet, none of it actually changes who we are. It just changes how we feel about ourselves.

When a post does well, it’s validation. When it doesn’t, it’s personal.Even when we know it’s not.

The truth is, likes don’t equal love. Follows don’t equal connection.They’re tiny, digital nods — nice to have, but not worth worshipping.

“Likes don’t equal love. Follows don’t equal friendship.”

Lately, I’ve been trying to separate my work from my worth. To remind myself that just because something doesn’t get engagement doesn’t mean it didn’t resonate with someone. Maybe they just didn’t know what to say. Maybe they’re tired. Maybe they’re reading quietly — the same way I read, quietly.

And maybe that’s enough.

Because at the end of the day, social media is supposed to be social, not survival. Not a scoreboard. Not a ledger of who’s “winning” the internet this week. Just people — trying, sharing, showing up.

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So yeah, likes and follows might be the new social currency, but I think I’m done treating it like a paycheck. I’d rather have real connection — the kind that lingers after the screen goes dark.

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xoxo,

MJ